Desire vs Hedo. A Lifestyle Resort Comparison

It’s funny, when you look at the Lifestyle Forums and in particular, the ‘Lifestyle Vacation’ threads people are categorised generally into two distinct groups; Hedo (Hedonism) or Desire fans. You probably realise that we fit into the latter, but we feel it’s important to give out all the available information to you all. We came across an exceptionally well written, fair and balanced comparison of Hedo v Desire, which would like to share with you.

I often think to myself, ‘well there is no comparison, Desire is couples only and Hedo allows singles’, however I forced myself to rethink that view as perhaps a little shallow, especially considering that everyone in the Lifestyle has different preferences. So by showing the two resorts side by side will give people the knowledge to make their own educated decision. There’s no denying, we are Desire people, but want to make sure we present all options for all people.

We have reproduced the report below with kind permission from the authors (thanks very much S & R!) So sit back, grab a coffee (or a cheeky red) and enjoy the review.

“We know this is a forum for Desire trip reports and we have written many in the past. We also know that many people who read this forum are doing their research to determine if Desire is right for them. We offer this report on our Hedo trip July 31- August 5 and the inevitable comparisons that we have made between the two resorts.

After visiting Desire 7 times in the last two years, including a stay at Pearl in March of this year, we are self-admitted Desire fans. Let that be disclosed up front. We are 43 year old, married, committed, experienced swingers that got into the lifestyle by visiting Desire many times and being coaxed in by its sexiness, charm, honesty and fun. If you want see our evolution, look back at our many past trip reports posted here.

H2-010 Pearl Jacuzzi Desire Jacuzzi

Hedo Pool & Jacuzzi Desire Pearl Jacuzzi Desire RM Jacuzzi

A common topic of afternoon conversation in the Desire rooftop Jacuzzi is the other most famous lifestyle-friendly nude resort in the world… Hedonism II in Negril, Jamaica. We’ve heard all the stories and we had to see it for ourselves. When we returned earlier this week we were showered with questions from our network of other Desire enthusiasts about our trip. Its important to understand that while admittedly biased, we went with truly open minds and insisted to each other that we would not compare the two resorts during the trip because we wanted to just enjoy and get the full effect. We promised ourselves we would wait until we got home for comparisons. So, we are home now. Here’s our honest, brutal assessment…

Our vacation was fun, really fun, and after all any trip like that is really about the people you meet not the resort. We met some very fun sexy people, but here is the thing, there is no way to deny it, when it comes to the actual resort, Desire is just better.

Before we went, we were told that the rooms are nicer at Desire…they are. That the pool is nicer at Desire… it is. That Desire’s grounds are more lush and beautiful…they are, and that the service at Desire is way better… it is…WAY better. By the way, the service at Hedo was fine. No complaints here. You have to remember that you are on “Island Time” and relax. The pace and attentiveness isn’t really slow, but its hardly impressive. Is just that Desire’s service is ridiculously awesome by any standard. You just cant beat it. We understood all that, but the trade off was that Hedo has the reputation of being an amazing, unrivaled party that is worth giving up some comforts for and that’s what we wanted to see. Our observation…The party was fun and sexy but honestly, in 5 nights we never saw anything that we don’t see on every trip to Desire. The party is fine, just not unprecedented as it was advertised. The same action and playfulness exists at both resorts and the amenities are way better at Desire.

Desire Riviera Maya Swimming Pool Hedo Pool Desire Pearl Pool

Desire RM Pool Hedo Pool (one of) Desire Pearl Pool

When we talked with veterans of Hedo, they always seem to say they haven’t tried Desire for 3 main reasons.
They say they have heard…

1. At Hedo you can have sex anywhere you want but at Desire you cant.
That’s technically true, but not the practical reality. In actual fact, 99% of the public sex that happens at Hedo occurs in the same spots where it does at Desire. Around the hot tub/pool in the afternoon, and around the hot tub late at night. After all, realistically, not many people have sex on the beach at 10:00 in the morning. There is definitely not more public sex at Hedo and the sex that does occur is WAY hotter at Desire because Desire is set up for it. It isn’t crude uncomfortable groping on the concrete by the hot tub like at Hedo; it’s slow, hot, sensual love making or even group play on comfortable open air beds set up by the pool. It’s much hotter and more erotic at Desire. No question.

One more huge factor contributing to this is that there are singles at Hedo. Now, don’t get us wrong, we do enjoy a little play with singles once in a while. We have been with both men and women and had great experiences (some even at Desire). We aren’t opposed to that situation, but Hedo is an uncomfortable meat market. We were all but driven out of the hot tub every night and eventually began to skip it because we didn’t want to fight the sharks waiting to pounce. If, in the hot tub, late at night, after an evening of grinding on each other in the disco, we started kissing or touching each other in an amorous way, my wife would inevitably feel the probing touch on her leg or back of a creepy single guy hoping that she was too distracted and turned on to resist his advance. It was a very uncomfortable vibe and ruined a sexy situation that, at Desire, where there are only couples allowed, is one of our favorite times of the day. The crowd at Desire is classier, and on average, sexier and the vibe, which is made possible, in part because it is exclusively couples policy, is romantic and sensual unlike Hedo where it is borderline crude and crass at times.

2. Desire is boring. Hedo’s party is better.
Definitely not true. We were there during the last few days an annual group’s takeover and were adopted by a fairly large group (75 couples) and got the feel of the fun party time at Hedo. After they left, our last few nights were spent with no group and the party was expectedly dependent on the crowd. Good some nights and slow some nights. That’s understandable and true at Desire too. The crowd changes from day to day and so does the vibe. Some nights are off the hook hot, and others are mellow and we have found ourselves almost alone in the Desire hot tub at midnight wondering where everybody is. It’s not that different at Hedo.

The point is, Hedo’s reputation for a nonstop ridiculous party is over-hyped. Desire’s is, in actual fact, essentially the same party and sacrificing all of the other superior amenities of Desire is not worth the supposedly superior Hedo party. We believe that Hedo, which was the first resort of of this kind, was, for a time, the only and best option for this kind of fun and it’s reputation was deserved as being unprecedented, but that’s just not reality anymore. Most of the 10, 20 or 30-trip Hedo veterans understandably have adopted it as their second home and love it. More power to them, but most haven’t tried Desire. If, and when, they do, Hedo is in trouble because the Desire experience is empirically better for most people….Not all, but most.

3. Desire is more expensive.
Well, all we can say to that is that the day after we got home from 5 nights in Hedo, we went online and booked 5 nights from March 18-24 at Desire for $100 less than we paid for our Hedo trip. Granted, it is at a lesser room category. We stayed at a ocean view room at Hedo on the nude side and booked a garden view room (as we always do) at Desire, but the flight is direct from Detroit to Cancun for us and way more convenient and that reduces the price as well as gets us on the beach faster and easier. After all, the two hour transfer to and from Montego Bay to Negril and the multiple stops to drop off other passengers at neighboring resorts which is common in Jamaica is, in itself, a huge deterrent to returning to Hedo especially when Desire is a quick, 15 minute, $35, private ride to the naked fun!

We could go on and on about the comparisons. Some things are of essentially equal quality (room cleanliness, food, entertainment, disco, water sports and activities). Some things are a little nicer at Hedo (fitness center, piano bar) but overall, Desire is clearly superior.

We could easily complain about things that occurred on our Hedo trip like the lack of air conditioning in the evening dinner areas making meals extremely uncomfortable, or the rooms that have paper thin walls which prevented us from sleeping soundly on any night due to the inconsiderate drunk people yelling or smashing things in adjacent rooms or right outside our door in the middle of the night, or the fact that most off the resort had no hot water for the first two days of our trip forcing us to wipe off with towels in the sink, dry shave, and heavily perfume before dinner each night (incidentally, the staff was apologetic, but really couldn’t do any thing to fix the problem of an old main boiler that wasn’t working and probably, like most things there, could use an update or replacement). We really aren’t complaining.

We had a fun trip. It is what you make of it and attitude makes or breaks a vacation. We learned long ago that if you let little inconveniences ruin your vacation, that’s your problem, but here is the final word…

Would we return? Yes, BUT only the day after Desire closes its doors forever. There is just no reason to go back when a clearly superior alternative exists. Desire is unmatched. Don’t miss it.

We view trip reports as a way to “pay it forward” to future travelers like others have done for us and we look forward to your future reports after many of you return from paradise.

Obviously, as you can tell, our opinion is that both resorts are fun, but Desire is better. To reply to a couple of points…

Hedo Unrenovated Room Hedo Renovated

Hedo Unrenovated Room Artists Impression of New Hedo Room

We did understand when we went, that Hedo was purchased by a new owner and that improvements are underway. We can confirm this. There were fresh coasts of paint on some areas and, contrary to what we were anticipating, the food really is of very good quality now, even on a level similar to Desire’s, however, the overall ambience is, as yet, unchanged. Maybe because of Hedo’s carved totems and painted stones which are left behind by past visitors to memorialize their trip and can be found lining all of the pathways and gardens, or maybe due to the very small physical area that is the nude side which causes it to be disproportionately heavily-trafficed, Hedo has a feeling more like a really upscale campground and the facilities are just not maintained or cleaned in the same way they are at Desire. Those things didn’t bother us. We aren’t snobs, but you cant deny quality and cleanliness when you see it.

Desire Pearl Room Desire RM Room

Desire Pearl Room Desire RM Room

With regard to the cost, obviously Desire is a better value for us, but we would advise that even if you have to pay a little more for Desire, do it. For us, and most people, vacation is an infrequent opportunity. Don’t scrimp. You get what you pay far. Desire is superior.

The diving point is a good one. We snorkel but we aren’t scuba divers. There could be a value in including the cost of your dives at Hedo. Incidentally, we talked with friends who have been to both resorts, are divers, have been on dives at both, and just returned from DRM three weeks ago. They tell us that the diving at Desire is spectacular and like almost everything else far superior. The short ride to the dive site (15 minutes offshore) is to a beautiful clear water reef and the trip is made even better by the fact that there is a second nearby site with a very rare opportunity to explore a submerged wreck. They raved about it. The best part was that after a two tank dive, they returned to the resort by lunchtime and didn’t miss a minute of the sexy fun… also very unusual as divers usually commit most of a day for such a trip.

As far as the singles go, it should be noted that there are single women at Hedo too which on the surface sounds hot, but really in the same way as single men, changes the atmosphere a lot. There is just no substitute for the sensual nature of a couples only environment.

One last additional topic that seems fair to address although no one has commented on it here is the issue of security.
If we were to give the fourth most common concern from Hedo veterans about Desire, it is that they believe that travel in Mexico is not safe. Most cited news reports that made them wary of their personal security in Mexico. Its a legitimate concern but, honestly, one we have never ever felt. Mexico and its people have only been professional and accommodating to us and we always feel totally safe at Desire. Granted, we never leave the resort. After all, there is way too much sexy fun at Desire to leave and risk missing any of the party or show, but our experience is that the rumors of security risks are greatly exaggerated.

Paradoxically, it was at Hedo that we felt the occasional concern for safety as we were advised by most other guests not to leave a woman alone or let her go the the restroom unescorted late at night as there were single men and locals who supposedly watch for a woman alone to proposition them. I actually left the hot tub several times to escort tired or tipsy single women back to their rooms late at night for their safety. Please don’t misunderstand. Hedo is an overall safe fun environment, but the idea that personal safety risks in foreign counties are exclusive to Mexico is preposterous.

All in all, both resorts can provide a great experience, but rest assured, if you’ve booked your trip to Desire and are anxiously counting down the days, you will not be disappointed. Go with an open mind and prepare for the time of your life.”

Click HERE to book your next Desire Vacation!

Please leave your comments below as to your preference of Desire or Hedo and your thoughts on both.



Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.