Is The Lifestyle For Shy People? – We Say “Yes”.

I’m having issues with Playboy TV Swing Season 5. Don’t get me wrong, I love the show and am a staunch advocate of it, but I feel the dynamic of the resident couples has changed and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Now I have said before, I’m sure the editing process leaves a lot to be desired. What we (as Swingers) would like to see in an episode may well be very different to editors who are not in the lifestyle and are under directive to show a certain amount of sex to satisfy commercial demand. Perhaps the directors of the show steer it in a certain way or perhaps the residents are too new to the lifestyle or just want to play between themselves. I don’t know, but I’m confused.

Episode 5 introduced a young and shy couple into the lifestyle named DJ and Jeremy. Now, we all remember back to the first time we swung, many of us were probably a little timid and on nearly every lifestyle vacation we’ve been on, whether it is a resort or cruise, we’ve seen it. So it is perfectly acceptable to feel that way, it’s sometimes intimidating, even for seasoned pros like ourselves ;)… but does being mindful and accommodating of newbies now, change the way you interact or play?

In this episode, the newbies were slowly getting into it in the red room, but it was obvious from their body language and from verbal discussion about their shyness earlier in the day, that they didn’t know how to approach people. So, they started having a bit of soft play, then looked on longingly from the sidelines, while an experienced resident went in for the kill with the couple they were initially playing with. BOOM! Door closed and no chance of the full swap they were preparing for. So do you think the residents in this episode should’ve been more attentive to the new couple, or carry on the existing sexual relationships that they obviously already have between themselves?

There’s the newbies, bottom left of picture, watching on after they were “cock blocked” by an experienced resident couple.

One of the comments from a resident couple really bothered me. He said ‘The lifestyle wasn’t built for shy people’. We beg to differ. Shyness is definitely not an indicator of confidence or sexual prowess, nor is it a negative personal attribute. The world (and swinging) needs balance and just because they were quiet entering the lions den of the Swing House, doesn’t mean they are not suited to the lifestyle AT ALL! There are many different types of lifestyle activity, large house parties, resorts, cruises, small intimate gatherings, online website communication, each with their own pros and cons and each attracting different personality types. It is our belief that the lifestyle is not the place for arrogant and ignorant individuals who thrive on dominating the spotlight, cock blocking those moving at a slower pace and those judging a couples suitability for the lifestyle based on a couple of hours of limited interaction.

I don’t blame DJ and Jeremy for feeling intimidated by the couples, there are many aggressive personalities in the house (the words of previous newbies, not mine) and I think Season 5 is suffering without the educational and nurturing qualities of Holli and Michael. Nikki and Daniel are natural replacements, whom always come across as caring, respectful and dead sexy, but they’re not getting much air time this season. They seem to always have a fun time, but don’t aggressively pursue sex at any cost, which may not fit the brief of the direction Playboy wanted Swing to take.

(Update – Nikki & Daniel show exactly how an experienced couple should help out newbies in episode 6. Click HERE to read that post.)

One thing is for sure, the recycling of activities and games from previous seasons is getting a little boring. Perhaps we can send them a few new ideas for next year, or volunteer for the position of activities coordinator. This is just my opinion and I welcome your thoughts. Please post below.